Christmas Tree Clean-Up

1. Carefully lift ornaments off branches trying not to shake anymore pine needles (or tree crumbs) onto floor than are already present.
2. Give up as tree is shaking and needles, crumbs, as well as ornaments are falling everywhere.
3. Rip lights off. No need to be conservative now, all of those bloody needles are on the ground anyway.
4. Drag tree through house, completely giving up on tree crumb prevention, muttering under breath while all those sweet smelling tree crumbs find every nook and cranny in your house and body only to show up in July when you thought every last one of those buggers were finally gone!
5. Toss that blasted tree into the garbage and swear by all that is holly... next year....a fake tree.